[The sound comes on with a clatter, as though the Hitomi has been dropped, or set down very quickly.]

Valeria? Something wrong?

[Valeria's voice has that cheery tone about it.] Wrong?  N-no... why would anything be wrong?

I don't know. Something about your expression for a second just seemed.... I don't know. Maybe I'm just seeing things, huh? [Kisame laughs.]

Mmh... I don't think you're old enough to be seeing things yet.  Come sit with me?

Heh, I hope not.... [Cloth rustles quietly as he makes himself comfortable.]

You're not!  [More rustling follows with a sudden shift in weight, as though someone were moving, changing places.  She pauses as she settles down again, her voice sounding closer in proximity to that of the other speaker now.]  I might be, though....

[Kisame laughs, making a little pleased noise as Valeria settles.] You? You're ten years younger than I am.

That doesn't mean anything!  My eyes could still play tricks on me.  Although... [The playful note in her voice dims; her tone becomes somewhat more mellow, perhaps tinged with concern.]  Maybe you're right...

And you just said.... [A quiet huff, half amused and half exasperated as he drops the subject; Kisame softens a bit as well.] Right about what?

Ah?  [Oh, she's looking for her words now.]  Well.... ahm...

Hmm? [Another rustle, this time quieter and briefer.]

[And a breath is taken in anticipation of certain words.]  I mean, I... I know you and Itachi are close and... okay, so you're really close.  I bet if we lived in Konoha, you'd be inseparable close and...

I guess so? [He sounds a little confused, understandably; this has sort of come out of the blue.] I mean, Itachi needs his own space, of course. And time with his husbands, just like I need time with you. [There's a barely audible rasp, like someone running a hand over a piece of sandpaper.]

[She softens audibly, hesitation making its mark simultaneously.]  I guess that's true...... [Another breath.  This one sounds half-exasperated and wrought with frustration not at him, but at herself.] It's just... I want you to be happy, Kisame.  Really, truthfully happy.  Not just a little happy, but really happy, you know?

[And she's on a roll.  She doesn't pause, doesn't give him the opportunity to get a word in because she knows she'll clamp her mouth shut if she lets him and not say another word.] And... I mean, if... if you ever.. I- don't know...  If you ever wanted to... if you ever wanted Itachi that way, I... I guess... ... ... if it was okay with his husbands, I guess...

I guess it would be okay with me, too!

[It sounds rather like she's squeaking. Or like she might hyperventilate. It's odd and disconcerting, not at all how she normally speaks. For a moment, there's just a long, uncomfortable silence.]

I--th-that.... I-I'd never--even if I.... [Look who's suddenly flustered and looking for words as well? He's obviously too taken aback to get out a proper sentence, floundering for a few moments before recovering; still though, the note of alarm and something like panic from being so suddenly put on the defensive spot remains.]

That's... Itachi w-would never want something like that. Besides, we've been partners for over nine years now, and--I-I'd never want to strain our friendship like that. And-and he's married now, I'm married now....

I'd never want to ruin anyone's happiness. Not Itachi's, not Naruto or Akira's, and especially not yours. [Little flustered laugh.] I love you, you know? You don't need to worry about a thing.

[The squeaking is mostly gone by the time she speaks again, but she's still very flustered and it's still very much audible.]  I'm not worried!  W-who said anything about being worried?  I just...

[Her voice tightens again and the amount of emotion poured into her words might make them burst.]  I love you, Kisame.  You know that.  More than anyone or anything ever... a-and like I said, if... if being with Itachi would make you happy, then I'm okay with that.  I mean, I'd be okay with it, if you two ever decided you wanted that.  [A pause.  All embarrassment goes out of her voice here, and there's a very personal, very predatory edge about her next statement that might make the dead quake in fear.]  But only with Itachi.  [Because he's the only person she'd dare trust with her husband besides Samehada, who doesn't rightfully count in a certain very important aspect of this realm.  She softens nonetheless.] And only because I want you to be happy...

That's why.

[Wait.]

A-and that's why I said if it was okay with his husbands!  I'd never condone it otherwise!  I just... [Am running out of words.  Should probably stop talking before her squeaking gets worse and she sounds more like a mouse than she did before. God, she loves you, Kisame, or she'd have never brought this up to begin with.]

Itachi would never want that anyway, whatever his husbands think. [Kisame sounds so certain of that fact; reminding himself that nobody else would ever possibly want him is enough to help banish the "oh god what" edge from his voice.] And you know I'd never look at anyone else. I'm happy with you, just the way things are. As long as you're happy....

Of course I'm happy!  [The rustling of fabric can be heard, sudden and urgent.  Nevermind that she doesn't at all agree about his initial statement about Itachi.  Sincerity pools in her voice, her words, and flows readily into them.]  I'm more than happy with you, the way things are, and I'd never, ever look at anyone else!  [A small smile creeps into her tone.]  Nobody else can compare.

I just... wanted you to know. [She's calmer.  At least, that's what her tone, which is quite affectionate at this point, says.] Because I want you to be happy.  That's all.

Well, good. I'd be..... worried, if someone else wasn't treating you right. [And that voice might remind one of just why Kisame is called the Monster of the Mist, a sinuously dangerous, viciously protective tone that promises blood and anguish, torture and terror to any interlopers who dare to not be up to his standards.]

[And just as suddenly, the predator, the monster is gone, evaporating like morning mist in the wake of a much lighter laugh.] If we're both happy, then I guess there's nothing to worry about, huh?

[A quiet shifting noise follows, and what sounds like a kiss.]

[Rich, thick, warm, content; she's practically purring and there's nothing innocent about it.]  Mmh, no... I guess not.  [There's nothing innocent about the audible shift and rustling of fabric either, the sudden, keen clicking of teeth as though from a nip sounding shortly thereafter.  What follows that is surely a kiss...]

Mmmm....

[...and then sudden, dead silence.]

Kisame?

[Kisame's hum of pleasure is far from innocent either; the kiss lasts longer than it probably should have. He takes a moment to switch gears at the sound of her voice; she seems concerned, suddenly, so he does too.] What's wrong?

[Something, dammit.  She'd just as soon have ignored it in favor of his hum, but --

Oh God.

Oh.

God.]

Is... is that thing on?

Is what thing--wait. Wait.... [A bit more shifting, and the sound of the Hitomi being picked up; suddenly, he seems to have forgotten completely about them being.... otherwise engaged.]

Oh, Hell. Why was this thing on in the first place? [Sounds like he's fumbling with the Hitomi, now; it beeps at him obstinately.] Do you know how to take entries off these things, or make them stop recording? Or change what they say?

[There's more shifting.

More very panicked shifting.]

I don't know!  Can you do that?  I've never tried....

I haven't either. I think this might work, though.... [Another, louder beep.]

Oh, fu-- [The post abruptly ends.]



((OOC: Blue = Kisame, Purple = Valeria))